“first off"s anymore! It’s 2017. It’s Tuesday. It’s #TMIishTuesday.
there mighty people of the internet!
And welcome to issue #43 of #TMIishTuesday – my weekly Tumblr post about
what goes through my mind and what you guys want to know more about. It can be
something very personal, it can be something political, it can be completely
pointless – but in 99.9 % of the cases, it involves opinions. And mine as well.
week I went quite cliché by posting my new year’s resolutions as my last post
of 2016. Addition to my 5 resolutions from last week: 6. Use after-shave every
day. I haven’t for a while. For which reason?? Also: So far I haven’t failed
any resolution. I mean… It wasn’t too hard, but still. Kind of proud. 😀
and guess what follows on a cliché post!? Another cliché post! First post of
2017. What better time to reflect on 2016? Yeey, I’m so creative! 😛 But you
know me. If you are expecting a break-down of political events, you might need
to look somewhere else. I’m sure the BBC, NBC, or ARD have made enough
"year in review” broadcasts to fill an entire year. No, THIS is a
reflection of some of the events that
– I figured out in 2016,
– I learned
I in 2016,
achieved in 2016,
moved me in 2016, or
have made my 2016.
Let’s see, if we can make it to 16 things.
okay to be gay!
At the start of 2016 I came out to basically anybody, who knows. The only
exception being my best friend. That was in December 2015 already. But in 2016
I told another very close friend (who might also be reading this. Hi there!),
my parents, and the parents of my two best friends. Every single one of them
has been absolutely supporting. Thanks to all of you guys! ❤
Bosses can be assholes!
Don’t get me wrong: I’ve had three jobs last year and only one boss was an
asshole. But this dude. Wow! I applied for a job to do in the period between
Christmas and my new study that started in August. Among others, I applied at a
call centre. Not the most satisfying job, but decent enough. It was all about
getting working experience anyways. But this dude ordered me 4, 5, 6 times to
do 1-2 hours of calls under his supervision saying that I was very close to
getting the job all the time. All of that lasted from mid January to mid
February. Then he said we should schedule yet another meeting and that he would
email me a date for the following week. I was already really fed up with him
and the entire place. And he didn’t message me. When I emailed him half-way
through the following week, he replied that they had no more interest in me.
That was such a kick in the face! I basically worked my ass off for them and
was then fired. I had no contract or anything, but still. I feel like they
betrayed me for 150-200 euros there. So that was an experience…
Having help in looking for a job is crucial!
applied loads for the apprenticeship that I started last August. 40, 50 letters
for sure. By mid-January a friend of my parents, who had heard I was looking
for one, approached me: Hey, so, I heard that this rehabilitation clinic is
looking for an apprentice still. I’m cool with their Vice CEO. You could tell
them I sent you and just try your luck. At the end of February I had an
interview there – and after doing a one-week internship I received a call
saying I could start there in summer. WOOHOO!
a cashier can be awesome!
had been “fired” (if you want so), I felt let down, discouraged. But
I wanted to work really badly. Sitting at home doing nothing really felt bad.
So I applied as a cashier at the supermarket closest to my parents’ (where I
had moved back in). And I got the job. Worked 4-6 hours a day, 6 days a week.
Having basically no weekend (when you work late shifts on Saturday and early
shifts on Monday) really sucks, but it pays just like any other job you can do
without a study. Not having to pay any rent, I made quite some money. And it
was really fun as well! It’s a massive supermarket and there are lots of
returning customers – also from the surrounding area. Not just the city itself.
It’s quite a cool store tbh 😛 And my colleagues were really cool as well. On
New Year’s Eve I went there for the first time since leaving for a different
city. Just walking through those sliding doors I felt “at home”. Such
cool people! I kind of miss that place. In a way…
Tumblr is cool!
past days I realised how Tumblr played a big role in my coming out process. I
never really was aware of its influence. But in Summer (or so) 2015, half a
year before coming out, I created this account and followed some blogs posting
cute guys. That was the first hint, I guess? In 2016 I continued scrolling
through these posts and got waaay more into it. Not only did I start writing
texts that I posted on Tumblr, but the amount of time I spent scrolling and
browsing just increased a lot. And I like it. Oh, and I posted my coming out
story to have it written down somewhere where I can read it any time I want to
– and yet hidden from friends. Great decision! I wouldn’t remember it as well,
if I hadn’t put it there. And look what has developed from this all! I write a
ton of stuff about stuff that matters to me. Every week. And I did 21 posts of
#mightyadvent as well. I love it! Thanks for reading my ramblings, guys!
out videos are great and the world is not binary!
something that is probably also valid even more for December 2015, but: I
freaking LOVE coming out videos. Recently I’ve been way too busy and haven’t
watched one in probably a month or so. But until May or June I probably watched
EVERY coming out video that was uploaded to YouTube. Just to get a feeling of
how my coming out had gone. And because I wanted to hear other people’s
stories. There is a huge mixture of reactions out there. People getting
disinherited or getting hit. People with indifferent parents. People who got
very loving responses telling them they supported them the way they are. I was
lucky enough here.
While I knew that there is more than just
– male/female for gender and
hetero/gay for sexual orientations,
really knew what else there was. Like, what exactly is there beyond the binary?
Then I started watching all those coming out videos. And I stumbled across
people identifying as all kinds of genders and sexual orientations. Even if
some were trolls (remember the guy who came out as playing Minecraft? F*ing
bastard! Sorry, I shouldn’t call people this, but he deserves it), I saw LOADS
of real, sometimes very inspiring videos, and stories that just make you go
“awwww”. Anyway, I’m drifting off again. What I wanted to say here
is: I learned that there are more than two genders and more than two sexual
orientations. I knew that transsexuality existed, but never had an idea what
people felt like going through it. And I now know a lot about asexuality or
pansexuality as well.
Twitter is queer, too!
summer I somehow stumbled across VollzeitJonas’s Twitter. He must have replied
to some YouTuber’s tweet or so. Anyway, I followed his account and thereby
truly boosted my experience. By him posting some stuff and retweeting lots and
lots on LGBTQ+ issues, I began to discover the topics as well. I found
queer.de, a wonderful German news website that focuses on news on LGBTQ+
issues. And I found dbna.de, a site for gay youth. Dating website, community,
forum, tips – it’s all on there. From Jonas’s Twitter account it basically just
evolved over time. I interacted with him and others, who follow him and by now
I follow some more cool peeps. I like that!
Living on your own rocks!
moved twice this year. From the students’ house in the Netherlands I had lived
in for the past 4.5 years to my parents’ house (in February) and then to the
place I live now. And I’m really living on my own for the first time. It took
some money to get all the stuff needed to fill an entire apartment. And I
basically spent all the money I had earned over the 4.5 months before as a
cashier. But: It was worth it. I really like my interior. It also took some
time to get used to all the stuff you have to do when living on your own
entirely – with no flat mates. Not owning a dish washer, cleaning everything on
your own, cooking on your own… You name it. But it certainly offers some
advantages as well.
can be a positive thing, too!
started the apprenticeship in August I was quite scared. How would I be able to
cope with working 40 hours a week and having to study for school at the same
time. It was quite hard to get used to, to be honest. But I figured out I don’t
have to study tooooo much for school. My study pays off. At times I feel like
the most difficult thing is constantly translating from English to German cause
I studied in English. Work itself is quite interesting. Different tasks and
while it gets a little boring at times, most of the times there’s more to be
done. And they try to assign me different tasks so I don’t get too bored.
That’s cool. Also I have – like at the supermarket – very lovely and caring
colleagues. One tiny downside: There’s only one guy my age there. And I think he
has a girlfriend. And for the “boring” stuff there’s a positive
news too: I’ll get to see a different department in two weeks, so a little more
variety to come. I enjoy working full time cause I can see what I am doing this
for already. That’s cool! However I should have taken a few days off work before
Christmas. I did like 95 % of my Christmas shopping the afternoon before. Oops.
car can save lives!
Let’s say it can improve the quality of life. I got a car a month after I
started the apprenticeship. It’s 15 years old. But you know… as long as it
keeps going… Plus it’s my first car. Oh and by going by car I save about 4
hours a week on travelling time. And some money as well. Sounds weird, but
makes sense once you realise that a month ticket for the train is more
expensive than day tickets for me cause I only work three days a week. The
other two are school which is located in the city I live. And the car also
proved very useful for visiting a friend in the Netherlands. He doesn’t live in
the place I studied at anymore, but moved further west to Apeldoorn, meaning it
was a two-hour drive for his birthday. By train it would have been 3 hours –
which I probably then wouldn’t have done. And it was about the same price to
go. Trains are f*ing expensive!
Travelling is the world to me!
go on a long holiday in 2016, but did several weekend trips. In May I went to
visit a friend in Denmark with the mates from my Dutch table tennis club. Had
the greatest time there! Three days of talks, catch-ups, table tennis, a cool
city (Århus), amazing weather – to say I enjoyed my time there would be a big
understatement! Side note: That is now the most Northern spot I’ve been to. I
told you about my trip to Apeldoorn already where we had a great time as well.
Even if it was only about 15 hours. And I pretty much just got back from the
last highlight of 2016: I visited a very good friend in Belgium. First time I
went to Belgium. Or well… I crossed it on the way to Orléans as a third-grader.
That doesn’t count, does it? Anyway, Belgium was really fun! Being with my two
best friends is always perfect. And exploring a city I have wanted to visit for
a long time, makes it even better: We went to Brussels for an entire day and
explored the city of Leuven for the other day. Really cool – both cities! Want
to go again! Have no trips planned for this year, but could imagine visiting my
Danish friend again – and who knows what else.
dating is hard!
I don’t know whether I mentioned this on here and I certainly didn’t “offline”.
But I’m sure there’s a tweet about this. In October or so I got inspired by VollzeitJonas and others and created an account on that gay online dating
platform. After some browsing I got a message from a guy, who was looking to
meet people. And I replied politely and thought I’d give it a try. But that’s
just as exams started at school and I had several other “big
projects” in this thing called “real life” and I felt I wasn’t
quite ready to invest that much energy at the time. That’s why it kinda just
ended after one message. Sad story. But totally not his fault. I think I should
give this whole online dating thing a go again. See my new year’s resolutions,
btw. [/shameless self-promo]
13. I can still feel the Pulse!
This is probably the most grief I’ve felt this year. I woke up some Sunday in June
to the news of Orlando. It was early morning over there when a “man” (should
we call him “man”, if he’s that cruel?) entered Pulse club. One of
the more popular gay clubs in the city. And now probably all LGBTQ+ around the
world know the club. For a very sad reason: That man didn’t just enter the
club. He fired into the crowd trying to assassinate as many as possible. 49
didn’t make it out alive, 53 more were wounded. Most of the people at the party
were of Hispanic background cause the club was holding a Latin night. That much
for the motive of the perpetrator and the description of what happened. Learning
about the events in the morning on Twitter just twisted my stomach. It was the
first major LGBTQ+ hate crime I heard of after discovering my own sexuality. I
follow several LGBTQ+ folks on Twitter, so the message spread to me rather quickly.
I realised how much of a deal this was when I saw so that basically any LGBTQ+
I follow on Twitter posted about it. Sheer madness. I had just become more
proactive and had just fully accepted myself as gay – and then THAT happened.
Writing about this still makes my fists clench. R.I.P. to all 49.
– the time of the year most people here in Germany get excited for Christmas.
And we have those cute little Christmas markets. You can get glühwein there and
fries and lots of (let’s face it: pretty useless) self-made stuff. The booths
are lit up with chains of light and everyone is just letting go of the stress
that tends to tension the atmosphere around that time of the year. A very
famous Christmas market is the one in front of Berlin’s Kaiser Wilhelm Memorial
Church which itself is one of the must-see places as a tourist. And then there
was the man who would kill 11 and injure 55 more when he drove a truck into
that very Christmas market on 19 December. I – again – read about it first on
Twitter. At first I thought it was just an accident and didn’t really bother
too much, skipping the messages in my timeline and scrolling on. But after an
hour or so I thought it was about time to check what really was going on in
Berlin. It was only then when I realised how bad things really were. We had our
first successful terrorist attack in Germany. R.I.P. to the victims!
15. Prejudice sucks!
New Year’s Eve 2015? Lots of people were sexually assaulted right next to the
famous Dom cathedral in Cologne. Potentially by men “of North African
appearance” (that’s what Police said). And there was an outcry in the
entire country for how ruthless “all the immigrants” were. What they
forgot – like so many times before and after the incident – is that a group of
5-50 people is not “all immigrants”. But that’s a different story I
could rant over for an entire #TMIishTuesday post. What also was part of the outcry
was how not-present Police were during that night. How was it possible that so
many ladies were assaulted in public and Police didn’t notice? No one really
knew the answer. Lesson of these events: More police will be present at big public
events. The results? Well… New Year’s Eve 2016. Cologne again. More police is
present. The square in front of the Dom is closed. And we still get news. News
that make me wanna puke again. Why? Apparently police checked kinda any
non-white person thoroughly, while not checking white people (or not checking
them that much). That’s prejudice. If not racism. And no debate about this: Police
being accused of being racist is an absolute no-go! And that should make them
think. For heaven’s sake, why can’t we just have a great time on New Year’s
Chocolate cereal likes to play hard to get!
I want to end this on a lighter note, so: In 2016 I discovered that my beloved
chocolate cereal really is hard to get hold of. The best deal is certainly at
the Aldi (thanks for not sponsoring this post, Aldi!). Problem here: People
know that. And in each batch there are like 12 (?) boxes of different types of cereals,
but only one box is chocolate cereal. And guess who went to the Aldi a good few
times just to get cereal and ended up NOT getting it because there were like 5
batches of cereal in the shelves, but all chocolate cereal was gone? Yepp. This
guy. Sad times!
I’d like to say thank you to all the lovely people who made this year as great
as it has been:
– My friends from my hometown: Stephan, Lukas, Ago, Dennis, Katja, Linus, Desiree,
– My “Dutch” friends, who are not all Dutch: Marc, Linda, Laura, Christina,
Martijn, Rik, Danny, Mette, Cédric, Annelies, Abhishta, Wouter, Menno, Celestine,
and the rest of my table tennis club
– My friends from the new town: Jenny, Florentin, Juliet, Linda, Marina,
Katharina, Lina, Dana, and the rest of my class
parents and family
– and so
many I probably have missed on this list.
Also thanks to loads YouTubers:
– Those that showed me that queer is cool: Ash Hardell, Ricky Dillon, Connor
Franta, Calum McSwiggan, ItsColeslaw, Troye Sivan, Hannah Hart, Chandler ‘N
Wilson, Sam Collins, Courtney-Jai
– Special shoutout to those who I witnessed coming out this year: Ricky Dillon
– Those whose vlogs up my day: Marzbar, Ben, Oskar, Felix von der Laden, Ben
Brown, George Benson, izzi, FunForLouis
– The German Minecraft gamers out there: skate702, CubePlayTV, Herr Bergmann
(plus teams #unfazbar, #Destilay and #Vibe for their great #VARO4 videos)
– The rest, who just don’t fit a category, but make THE BEST content: Julien
Bam, Applewar, Mikey Murphy
thanks to the lovely Twitter folks:
– VollzeitJonas, XLucamiraX, _FlexiHD_, achojo, Hennddrik, jsnjgr
This has become such a long post! I feel like it’s the longest I ever posted!
:O That was totally not the intention. And it turned out a little more
seriously than I initially planned. But that’s fine. That’s just a
representation of my life.
That’s been my 2016! Hope you liked it. I certainly did!
you achieve in 2016? I wanna know. Let me know by placing a comment, tweeting me, dming me, or what else
you can think of – you know the means to get to me.
As always: Next #TMIishTuesday next Tuesday. If you have any
questions in the meantime, just ask away.
Whatever you’re curious about – I don’t bite. 🙂
Also: Poll to determine next week’s topic will be up on Twitter on Sunday afternoon.
Until then: Stay mighty!
here’s some self-promo:
– Last #TMIishTuesday: http://mightbedamian.tumblr.com/post/155176055527/tmiishtuesday-42-new-years-resolutions
– Poll to decide next week’s topic and more very cool stuff: www.twitter.com/mightbedamian
more very cool stuff: mightbedamian.tumblr.com