Mein Regenbogenarmband – #TMIishTuesday #74

Seit geraumer Zeit bin ich Besitzer eines Regenbogenarmbands – und trage es hin und wieder. Was es für mich bedeutet und wo ich es trage – und wo nicht – diese Woche im #TMIishTuesday. Continue reading “Mein Regenbogenarmband – #TMIishTuesday #74”

Coming Out Story, Part 6 – #TMIishTuesday #67

It’s been a while since I last made a post totally focusing on myself. But it’s time for one. I briefly mentioned in my last post that I wanted to come out to my class last week. Well… Guess what I did!? Continue reading “Coming Out Story, Part 6 – #TMIishTuesday #67”

#TMIishTuesday #56 – The Social Democrats are a lie! – On the discussion of same-sex marriage in Germany

Hey,

No
pre-things to say – enjoy this week’s #TMIishTuesday. Well… “Enjoy”
is probably not the right expression with this topic in mind. But nonetheless:
I hope you like the post.

Hey
there mighty people of the internet!

And welcome to issue #56 of #TMIishTuesday – my weekly Tumblr post about what goes
through my weird mind and on what you guys want to know more about. It can be
something very personal, it can be something political, it can be completely
pointless – but in 99.9 % of the cases, it involves opinions. And mine as well.

// Last week I told you how I felt growing up
thin and rather small. The post focuses on how my peers reacted to that – and
how they made me feel. Click the link above, if you haven’t read it, yet. //

A couple
walks up to the civil registry office. The marriage registrar says:
“Excuse me, you are men.” and…
No punch
line.
Reality.

This
translation of a tweet by @politischernate is a pretty accurate description of a situation that could
arise any given day in any given German registry office. Sad reality.

I already addressed the topic of same-sex marriage in Germany in previous posts (e. g. the Letter to Society and – shortly in my comparison between the Dutch and German cultures). But
nothing has changed. So why should I bring it up again? Because f*ing nothing
has changed! And that feels just surreal! Absolutely ridiculous! It’s nothing
short of a political disgrace!

How can a country as progressive as Germany be behind so much on an equal
rights issue?

HOW ON
EARTH can some ignorant little a*holes in parliament play god? Think that is
exaggerated? Let me show you what happens and has been happening!

1. The German
population wants marriage equality – for years and years

For
years and years there have been polls by many different pollsters. The outcome
has always been the same: The vast majority of Germans are in favour of
same-sex marriage and equal rights, e.g. adoption rights. The most recent
survey
I found sees 75 % of respondents pro same-sex marriage.

2.
Parliament is pro marriage equality
With the
rather-left parties (the Left, the Greens and the Social Democrats) more than
half of parliament are in favour. Most of the Christian Democratic Union and
the Christian Social Union (the two parties form one grouping in parliament,
hence I will refer to them as the “Union” from here on) are still
opposing, but that shouldn’t matter. You got your 50 %. That’s what counts.

3. Party
discipline
But if
you thought this would do the trick, you’re wrong. Cause why should a democracy
be bound by democratic principles, right? Why should parliament take a decision that
the majority of MPs appreciate? That would be… That would… No! That would be
democratic! We certainly can’t do that!!
Instead let’s pretend we are the f*ing rulers of the world!
Oh and let’s
make our country less progressive than South Africa, Brasil, Uruguay, Mexico,
and the like. That makes so much sense, right!?
Okay,
party discipline. A very simple concept: If the majority of the party in
parliament holds a certain opinion, the rest of that party will vote for this
opinion as well. Prohibited by constitution in Germany – as in most democratic countries.
Still it widely exists and is carried out. How?!

4.
Dealing
The
coalition of the Union and the Social Democrats are governing. And how this
coalition works – given the two rather different approaches of both parties
(with the Union being rather “right” and the Social Democrats being
rather “left”) – is by dealing. “You get this, if we get this, okay?”
Remember when you and your childhood friend were 4 and he would let you borrow
his cool toy truck, if you gave him your toy dinosaur? But the deal was only
valid until one of you had enough of that toy and handed it back? That’s
exactly how this coalition works!
The Social Democrats got their minimum wage, the Union got their child care
subsidy. Both parties were very happy with one of these – and took the other
one cause it was part of the deal. With same-sex marriage, however, there’s a
problem. Well… It’s not a problem to the coalition it seems. But to the 75 % of
Germans mentioned above. The Social Democrats told us they were pro marriage
equality. And they really wanted to fight to implement it. That was back in
2013
. When they were
campaigning. But since it apparently was not too important of a topic for them,
they dropped it when agreeing on goals with the Union when fixing their
coalition. Instead we got a mere sentence in the agreement. It says: “We
will eliminate legal hurdles discriminating same-sex civil partnerships”,
but, quite frankly: That’s vague af! Also, (not so) fun fact: We’re approaching
the end of this election period and there are still hundreds of laws in place
that discriminate against same-sex couples.

5. The
incredible farce of the Social Democrats
Yepp,
you guessed it: I’m not happy with what the Social Democrats are doing with
their political power. I used to be quite a supporter of them. I gave one of my
two votes to them in the last elections of parliament. But I feel let down.
Running the 2013 campaign saying “100 % equality only with us!” is a
strong promise, yes. And I was aware that it might not be possible to achieve
that 100 %. I totally get that, when you are in a coalition with the Union,
it’s not exactly the easiest topic to address. But: If you make such a strong
statement – and if you decide to make it one of your core principles your
campaign is about – I expect that you at least fight for it over the next
election period!
It might be a little harsh of me, but I’ll say it like I feel it anyway: What
the Social Democrats did regarding same-sex marriage is fraud! During their
campaign they pinky-promised that they would fight for equal rights and
marriage equality. Not even a month later, the coalition agreement was signed.
And they had completely given in to the Union’s request. The Social Democrats
opted to live the Stone Age-like life instead of being the paving stone to what
might have been historic.

And this is where things get really hypocritical: The Social Democrats realised
they messed up just now. Five months before the election. They had 4 years to make the change. And they didn’t. They left the Union in peace. Instead of
insisting to put the topic on the agenda, they – jointly with the Union – voted
to not discuss it. Not 1 parliamentary week. Not 2 parliamentary weeks. Not 5 parliamentary
weeks. Not 10 parliamentary weeks. Not 30 parliamentary weeks. 49 !!! parliamentary
weeks! And bear in mind that parliament only has meetings in one of two weeks
every time! And that there is such a thing as the summer break as well.
All in all the oh-so-social Democrats voted to push the topic off the agenda f*ing
11 times! And now?

Now all of a sudden they tell the Union: “Let’s hurry! We need to make it
happen!”
Or… Well… They told them a month ago. By now – after the Union was like: “Why
now? We don’t have enough time left before the elections? Oh, and we need the
constitution to change [which is total bullshit! Marriage is not defined in the constitution. It only says: “Marriage and family” are under special protection of the state (GG, Art. 6 (1))].
That’s gonna take some time. Let’s just… wait?”
…by now the Social Democrats have changed their mind. Again. Now they say: “If
we don’t achieve same-sex marriage in this election period, we’ll definitely
make it happen in the next one.”

Like… WOW! Thanks for nothing! Also: You are aware that not mentioning a strict
deadline means you’re gonna end up in March/April of 2021, trying to push the
topic over the finish line once again? If – and that’s IF – there’s still a
majority in favour then. It looks like the AfD will be featured in parliament
quite prominently after the election. They are even more opposing of same-sex
marriage than the Union. You don’t want that to happen when pushing for
same-sex marriage.
Also: Sorry? But it was one of your core principles of your past campaign. And
you committed fraud to that promise 11 times!

YOU had the change to make it happen for FOUR years!
YOU chose not to do it!
If you were not completely OUT OF YOUR MIND, you would not declare marriage
equality your goal for the next election period.

DON’T
YOU SEE? That just makes you look STUPID as FUCK! The chance to change was
there. It was served to you on a silver platter. The opposition parties – the
Greens and the Left – did ALL the work for you! They prepared a very detailed,
very well-thought of proposal to change the law. All you had to do was NOD YOUR
HEAD. That would have made it pass and become law. The Bundesrat didn’t even
have to approve anymore – after all that was the chamber in which the Greens
and the Left proposed the law change. And the majority of the Bundesrat had
already approved of the changes.

But you
did NOT nod your head. And to be honest, you denied yourself the chance. Simply
by following the bad example of the oh-so-mighty Union – and putting it off the
agenda, and putting it off, and putting it off, and putting it off… 11 f*ing
times!

But,
okay. At least you realised you missed something over the last few years. But
WHAT THE FUCK are you doing now!??

If I
realise I did something bad, I apologise and do everything I can to change
things. As quickly as possible. But not the Social Democrats! They
proposed their OWN law change last week. Why? No one knows! Probably so they can say
“Haha! It was US who brought to you same-sex marriage!”. In ten years
time this might actually be very handy. However… talking of 10 years ahead: If
you ask me, the Social Democrats might be redundant in 10 years time, if they
proceed to do politics the way they do at the moment. Schulz might be a
good candidate. And tbh, I quite like him as a person. But that won’t make me vote for them. They
really disappointed me over the last couple years. And I feel that, if they
don’t change their “oh, the Union is so powerful, we are so helpless”
policy, a lot of others will feel the same. For me this story just shows one
thing:

They do not
deserve my vote!
Full stop.

If
you really want to work towards equal rights, why don’t you sign this petition
for same-sex marriage in Germany?
If you
do, tweet me, or tell me on another social media. I wanna know who are with me!

Before I
go, tell me your thoughts on same-sex marriage (in Germany and elsewhere) and
your opinion on the behaviour of the Social Democrats. I wanna know! Place a
comment, tweet me, dm me, or do anything else
you can think of to get to me.

Queer Shoutout you say? You know that I adore Troye Sivan and his music. Now it
has been announced that he’ll be rewarded with the GLAAD award for his
promotion of equality and acceptance. He’ll be the youngest recipient ever. Well deserved, if you ask me! He speaks
up so much for equal rights and knows how to use his platform. Well done,
Troye! Keep going!

As
always: Next #TMIishTuesday next Tuesday. If you have any
questions in the meantime, just ask away.
Whatever you’re curious about – I don’t bite. 🙂

Until then: Stay mighty!

Linkage:
– Link by politischernate: https://twitter.com/politischernate/status/832622707254534146
– Zeit:

Umfrage: Mehrheit der Deutschen für “Ehe für alle”:http://www.zeit.de/news/2017-04/02/gesellschaft-umfrage-mehrheit-der-deutschen-fuer-ehe-fuer-alle-02023803
– Dennis Klein and Micha Schulze for queer.de: Keine Ehe für alle: Merkel lässt Schulz abblitzen: http://www.queer.de/detail.php?article_id=28537
– Grundgesetz, Art. 6: https://www.gesetze-im-internet.de/gg/art_6.html
– Robert Klages for tagesspiegel.de: Gleichgeschlechtliche Ehen: Entscheidung über “Ehe für Alle” zum elften Mal aufgeschoben: http://www.tagesspiegel.de/berlin/queerspiegel/gleichgeschlechtliche-ehen-entscheidung-ueber-ehe-fuer-alle-zum-elften-mal-aufgeschoben/13683888.html
– Campact Petition zur Öffnung der Ehe: https://www.campact.de/gleichstellung/appell/teilnehmen/
– Jackie Willis for etonline.com: 

EXCLUSIVE: Troye Sivan to Become Youngest Recipient of GLAAD’s Stephen F. Kolzak Award: http://www.etonline.com/awards/213909_troye_sivan_to_become_youngest_recipient_of_stephen_f_kolzak_award_at_glaad_awards/

Oh, and here’s some self-promo:
– Last #TMIishTuesday: http://mightbedamian.tumblr.com/post/158934445048/tmiishtuesday-55-have-you-always-been-that
– My Letter to society: http://mightbedamian.tumblr.com/post/152304851890/tmi-ishtuesday-33-a-letter-to-society
– My comparison between the Dutch and the German culture: http://mightbedamian.tumblr.com/post/151988181967/tmi-ish-tuesday-32-cultural-differences-between
– All #TMIishTuesdays: mightbedamian.tumblr.com/tagged/tmi
– More #TMIishTuesdays on random topics: http://mightbedamian.tumblr.com/tagged/me
– More very cool stuff: www.twitter.com/mightbedamian
– Even more very cool stuff: mightbedamian.tumblr.com 

#TMIishTuesday #55 – Have you always been that thin? – Growing up thin (and small)

Hey!

No
announcements today. Just have fun reading! Oh, maybe one thing: I stole the
first part of the title from a video. More on that later.

Hey there
mighty people of the internet!

And welcome to issue #55 of #TMIishTuesday – my weekly Tumblr post about what goes
through my weird mind and on what you guys want to know more about. It can be something
very personal, it can be something political, it can be completely pointless –
but in 99.9 % of the cases, it involves opinions. And mine as well.

// Last week I told you about the shitty
situation that YouTube have created with their restricted mode: Why it has good
intentions – and what goes wrong with it. Check it out, if you haven’t already.
And if you are interested in the topic, here’s a great video by @ashhardell. //

I talked
about body image and what society makes us believe in that regard in a #TMIishTuesday
last November and briefly addressed my own situation: Being really thin – and rather small as
a child. I’m not too small anymore, but I still am really underweight. Inspired by the
DASDING video linked in the foreword, I want to talk a bit about how I
experienced the whole situation. What happened at school and basically
everywhere I went as a child.

I feel
that the things I experienced were not as bad as the ones mentioned in the
video. Still: It hurt when people questioned the same things every time.

The
first time I met new people (I should say guys cause girls didn’t care for the most part), it
always went a little bit like this: “Hi, my name is Damian.” – “Oh,
[insert comment about my stature]”.
I don’t remember kindergarten too much,
so I assume the other kids were fine with my stature then – or at least it didn’t
bother them enough to make fun of it. But when I got to primary school, things
started. Slowly, but steadily. I knew some of the kids from kindergarten still,
but there were lots of new people as well. And they started asking me how I
could be so thin? Questions like: “How do you even survive then?”
started. And I forgive them: When you’re 6, 7 years old, you’re just curious. And you’re
straightforward enough to ask such questions.

I was
the smallest child in the entire class – even if I was a year older. And height
was all that mattered to define who was cool and who was not. Still, I made
it through primary school with only one situation that really stuck to my mind.
But compared to what was to follow, it really wasn’t that dramatic. And if I
recall correctly, it wasn’t even about my stature, but rather about wearing the
“right” underwear. Yepp, children can be very picky.

Then
came secondary school – and the drama really started. I knew about three people of my class
and everyone else were new faces. 27 potential new bullies. And pretty much all
of the guys came for me. They picked on me for being small. They picked on me
for being thin. They told me I was anorexic (which I never was, luckily!). They told me my parents didn’t care
for me. They tried to convince me to stop living vegetarian (cause that’s where
being so thin came from according to them). They tried to make me do more
sports.

I had a
few hard years to go through, being call names for being so thin. The guys
wanting to touch my belly cause it was so skinny. Being lifted off the floor. And so on and so on. (I started writing this
pretty late, so this is all for the list, but it could get much longer for
sure!)

Well,
guess what? I only grew stronger from that. Not physically, but mentally. And I
learned how to take the underlying ridicule: Just ignore it. And if it gets too
much, tell them off and show your teeth! It worked.

In tenth
grade we had a class trip to Berlin. We only were only 11 guys in class, so we walked
around Berlin in that group of 11 (for once it was one group, not the seven or
eight “cool guys”, the two outsiders, and me). And we decided we
wanted to have dinner at the Mac. Like you do when you’re 16. And on the way,
everyone was trying to convince me to stop being vegetarian and finally taste a
burger. But I insisted I wasn’t going to do it. They even told me they would
pay for it. After a 10-15 minute discussion my patience was gone – and I told
them in a very decisive tone that it was not gonna happen. I would not taste a
burger – even if they tried to convince me for another 100 years. And guess
what? It didn’t happen. I had my fries and was fine. They all got their burgers
and were also fine. There were some attempts to still make me try a bite, but I
sticked to my opinion.

After
tenth grade, as puberty was taking a turn for the more reasonable and more
accepting, we got a new class and things got better. I still was the skinniest guy of them all. But at least we had another
guy in class, who was skinny as well. Granted, he wasn’t the most accepted, but
it worked for him. And it kinda worked for me as well.

From then onwards,
my stature didn’t matter anymore at all! I’ve met a lot of new people in the meantime. Uni, another uni, work, school, another work. Life’s fine. I’m still a veggie, I
still have the BMI of a feather, and I still don’t care too much what people
say about my body. Yeeey!
Btw, my two best friends became veggie, too.
Independent of each other. I feel I should take credit for that – even though I
never tell people how to live their lives.
If you want to eat meat – fine.
If
you want to color your hair (who would do that right? Haha 🙂 ) – do it!
If you finally got the guts to get an appointment at the therapist
to get that testosterone subscription – go, boy!

Whatever
you do – do it with passion!
Be who you are and be proud of it. Or to quote
Green Day singer Billie Joe Armstrong:
“Don’t
let these bastards dictate your life and try to tell you what to do,
alright!?”
(quote from the performance of the song Minority
at a Milton Keynes concert in June 2005)

Before I
go let me know whether you are satisfied with your stature and what people tell you about it. Tell me, I wanna know! Place a comment, tweet me, dm me, or do anything else
you can think of to get to me.

Queer Shoutout you say? How about Sam Collins then? I know, I listed pretty much
all of the LGBTQ+ creators I’m subscribed to on YouTube just last week, but let
me shout him out individually cause he deserves it. I discovered Sam by someone
retweeting his “I’m FTM transgender” video. It’s basically his coming out video. He also explains how he found out
that he is a guy, although he was born as a girl. He talks about how he lived
before and after he found out.
After the video, he kinda changed his channel and incorporated videos on trans
issues. And they are actually that good that I think, they deserve more
attention. Whether you yourself are transgender or not – watching them will
definitely educate you. He covered topics like top surgery, transitioning and
passing tips, signs you might be transgender, dating tips, and much more. And I
feel he’s very open about everything. Oh, and there are lots of topics not
related to trans stuff, too. Go, check him out!

As
always: Next #TMIishTuesday next Tuesday. If you have any
questions in the meantime, just ask away.
Whatever you’re curious about – I don’t bite. 🙂

Until then: Stay mighty!

Linkage:
– DASDING: Ja, wir sind dünn – Komm bitte damit klar!: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EpaWYLSrjs8
– #TMIishTuesday #53 – I dyed my hair:  http://mightbedamian.tumblr.com/post/158402870513/tmiishtuesday-53-i-dyed-my-hair
– Queer Shoutout: Sam Collins: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCySTKqYThqBbKdEtzOjFhgg
– Sam Collins – I’m FtM Transgender: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O68dTOfdeVw


Oh, and here’s some self-promo:
– Last #TMIishTuesday: http://mightbedamian.tumblr.com/post/158675683464/tmiishtuesday-54-youtube-stop-censoring-us
– All #TMIishTuesdays: mightbedamian.tumblr.com/tagged/tmi
– More #TMIishTuesdays on society topics: http://mightbedamian.tumblr.com/tagged/language
– More very cool stuff: www.twitter.com/mightbedamian
– Even more very cool stuff: mightbedamian.tumblr.com

#TMIishTuesday #53 – I Dyed My Hair!

Hey,It’s
finally happened! I’ve been telling you about dyeing my hair for AGES! And I
finally did it!! It’s not blue, like I first had in mind. But it looks AWESOME!Hey there
mighty people of the internet!And welcome to issue #53 of #TMIishTuesday – my weekly Tumblr post about what goes
through my weird mind and on what you guys want to know more about. It can be something
very personal, it can be something political, it can be completely pointless –
but in 99.9 % of the cases, it involves opinions. And mine as well.

// Last week I ranted  about dubbing and the habit of the German
speaking countries to voice-over virtually every international film. And I told
you about my experiences in the Netherlands – where they simply subtitle films.
Interested in the pros and cons of dubbing? Click the link above! //

So I will divide this post in several parts:
1) Who inspired me to get my hair dyed,
2) What people told me beforehand when I told them I was planning to dye my
hair blue,
3) What colour I went for, which part of my hair I
dyed, and how people reacted to that.

1) The inspirations for the colourations
Let’s start with how I came up with the idea to dye
my hair at all. I can’t tell you exactly when it was, but I know for sure WHO
was the first person that made me go: WOH, that dyed hair, tho! (Damian, just stop
your poor attempts to rhyme all the time!)
It was… the one, the only… Tyler Oakley. Self-entitled Queen, 100 % gay-looking
(the stereotypes, I know, but come on! If not him, who else??) and trying which
colour of the rainbow (how fitting!) looks best on him. When I subscribed to
him in December 2013 (9 December, if you’re interested – which I bet you aren’t
:D), he had dyed his hair rather blonde.
However, soon after, he decided that was boring. So he explored a bit. From
bright blonde, to the iconic
purple
 – which, imho, is the best
one he ever tried! -, to extremely bright purple,
to green, to green-turquoise,
to bright blue – another one of
my favorite colours when his hair is concerned. And then he stopped it. At the
beginning of 2015, he was back to blonde and in the meantime he has his natural
colour again.

That was the time that I discovered Dave Brown, known on YouTube as boyinaband
– then for his music, now for his fascinating philosophical explorations into
the world of society and technology. Very warmly recommending his latest videos
on what artificial intelligence (aka. computers) is capable of – and what it
might become capable of
. Okay, enough promo. Why I talk about him in a
hair-related post is – obviously – his hair. Until I discovered him, I thought
that Tyler had crazy hair. Wait for Dave’s hair! Long grown (in the meantime it
has almost reached his waist :P). AND: One side dyed red! THE ENTIRE LENGTH of
it! It looks incredible!

Sometime later Fabian Grischkat, whose videos with
his friends I’ve been following for two-and-a-half years now – sometime, Fabian
dyed his hair blue. Completely. A rather light blue, pastel colour-ish. I’ve
loved it from day one.

And I should mention ChanUndSo, another YouTuber,
who in fact was one of the first YouTubers I discovered. Chan has had his
blonde streak ever since. And it looks great!

To conclude the inspirations chapter: Though it’s
not hair-related, I feel that Troye Sivan and Connor Franta also influenced my
hair dyeing. In being proud of who they are. And doing “extravagant”
things that the average male wouldn’t do. Troye pierced his nose. Something
I’ve seen very rarely on guys. And Connor painted his nails. On video.
It’s a rather rambly video, but still: He did it. Oh, and obviously Troye just
SLAYED that black nail polish!! Like, it just looks SO good on him?! Both Troye
and Connor just showed to me that being a little bit off the mainstream can
look cool. And it’s totally acceptable.

As you see, I’ve basically been playing around with
the thought of dyeing my hair for about three years. And now I did it.

2) You sure ‘bout this?
When asked about the reasons why I dyed my hair, I
always have to swallow down a rude comment. Like, EVERYONE asks me: “But
why have you done it?” – Do I need a reason to dye my hair? Why DON’T you
dye yours? 😀 Like, I get that you don’t see too many people with colourful
hair. But especially the way I did it – one patch of turquoise on one side of
the fringe (quite like Chan actually) – it’s not that much of a deal?

Forgive my selfie skills. They’re non-existent.
 
I told my colleagues beforehand cause I wanted to ask my boss about it. I work for a government institution and people can be rather conservative there. Especially, if you are working with patients – which I do. Another thing: The clinic I work for is located in a rather rural area. Yes, it’s “only” 30 minutes by car until you get to a city that has it all. But right there… like… There’s not much? After all the place has only 7k inhabitants. That multiples the “that’s weird!”, “you shouldn’t do that!” comments.

As I told you briefly last week I talked to my
boss  beforehand and he didn’t really
like the idea of me getting blue hair. In fact he told me he thinks that
people, who dye their hair colourful, “are just begging for
attention”. Even though I told him it would only be one streak, he didn’t
like the plan. He did ask some other people (probably his bosses), though. And
apparently they told him he couldn’t forbid such a thing. All I know is that I
got a text a day after when I was in school: “Dear Mr. X, I
got your number from Ms. Y and wanted to write regarding your hair dyeing
question. If you wish to bring about a change of appearance, you may do so. KR
A. Z.”

Okay, three things about this: 1. I couldn’t even
make it sound as posh and formal as it is in German. It’s just unreal! 2. I got
the f*ing official GO by my boss! 3. Props to him for taking the effort! I
asked him on Wednesday and was only going to return to work on Monday. He did
that extra mile to ask a colleague for my number and then texted me. That’s
cool!

Anyway, so my boss knew about my wish to dye my
hair. And as you would expect in rural areas, word spread from there. 😀 When I
returned to work on Monday, the entire department knew. And I was their gossip.
For the entire three days that I was there this past week, they only knew one
topic: Damian is going to dye his hair! And blue as well!

“Are you sure you want to do that?”, “But why blue? Can’t you
dye it a normal colour?”, “How did you even come up with that
idea?”, “Be aware that that really sticks out. You will get the looks
by lots of people then”

And I was like: You know what? I’m still gonna do
it! They didn’t quite understand. And they didn’t want to. But that’s fine. I
just did it anyway.

After a failed attempt to bleach my hair, it worked
the second time (with more bleach). Then it was time to choose the colour. And
my hair dresser (who, btw, has dyed her entire hair a bright pink – and it
looks f*ing great!) showed me one she had used before. On the paper on which
she put it, it looked like a blue tone with a tiny note of green. It turned out
to be a rather bright turquoise. But I loved it! And I still do. Three days in.

3) The after-English. Er… After-Math.
The first one, who saw, was a good
friend of mine. He said he didn’t even realise at first sight. To be fair, he
was facing the sun 😀 But he liked it. Never in a million years would do the
same, but said it looked good. His mother passed as well. Was surprised.
Not sure, if she liked it, but didn’t back off in shock as well. 😀 Then it was
time to show my parents. Apparently my dad had overheard part of my convo with
the two others and was prepared. So was my mum who he had told. But they hadn’t
seen it. I had told them I was debating getting my hair dyed a year or two ago.
Now it came as a surprise to them. They really liked the colour.

Since I spent the weekend at my parents, I also saw friends of my parents and
my aunt and uncle. The friends REALLY liked it. They were going crazy about it!
Really cool as a start! My aunt and uncle, who are quite the conservative kind
of people (AND live in a rural area), didn’t make any comments about my hair.
I’m surprised at that.

Then came Monday. And work. I have to say I was a
little bit unsure about it. Like, so many colleagues had told me they probably
wouldn’t like it. And none had been really excited about it. But: Things turned
out really chill. Almost everyone was surprised I didn’t dye ALL my hair. It’s
not like I had told each and everyone a dozen times before it would only be a
small part, but hey! Who listens anyway? -.-

Anyway, most people made remarks about it. Most positive, a few neutral, but
none negative. I don’t know what happens behind my back, but to be quite
honest: I don’t care! Let them have their gossip really! I dyed my hair –
and I like it. I’m confident enough that I’d tell any haters off. And I think
being that confident actually is part of the reason for the positive feedback.

So what’s the take-away from this? People are cool
with it and it looks absolutely awesome! Oh, and it’s sometimes scaring me when
I face the mirror. But that’ll ebb away eventually. 😀

Before I
go let me know your thoughts on colourful hair. Would you ever dye yours? If so, which colour? Tell me, I wanna know! Place a comment, tweet me, dm me, or do anything else
you can think of to get to me.

This week’s Queer Shoutout goes to freakodelic, a small YouTuber, 23 years old
(if his bio is still up to date :D), who makes videos about his experiences
being a trans man in Germany: The “typical” changes testosterone
brings with it videos, but also on the whole bureaucratic hassles of getting
your name and gender legally changed, and the like. He’s the first German trans
person I found on YouTube who talks about all this kind of stuff. Check him
out, if you’re interested.

As always: Next #TMIishTuesday next Tuesday. If you have any
questions in the meantime, just ask away.
Whatever you’re curious about – I don’t bite. 🙂

Until then: Stay mighty!

Linkage:
– Tyler
Oakley: Kissing Straight Boys: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wcF0Qwozxmk
– Tyler
Oakley: Embarrassing University Stories: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gCLf4UvGj_c
– Tyler
Oakley: Streaking With YouTubers: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9l-xHazwYcw
– Tyler
Oakley: My Deadly Sour Cream Gun: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lBOkSrQ-Fo4
– Tyler
Oakley: 20 Emojis That Need To Exist: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nh8SzLOgCTE
– Tyler Oakley: How I Met My Queen This Week: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X0LACGwbRuE
– Tyler
Oakley: Tyler Oakley Reacts to Teens React to Tyler Oakley: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gNS04P8djk4
– Dave
Brown: These Google AI experiments are crazy! This is the future: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t4thhWiWnqI
– Dave Brown: Why AI will probably kill us all.: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SPAmbUZ9UKk
– Fabian
Grischkat: http://instagram.com/fabiangrischkat

ChanUndSo: https://www.youtube.com/user/ChanUndSo
– Troye Sivan: https://www.youtube.com/user/TroyeSivan18
– Connor Franta: https://www.youtube.com/user/ConnorFranta
– Connor Franta: Painting My Nails & Other
Things: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1X2ZG_isjBI
– Queer Shoutout: freakodelic: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBn_3X1D-R_lcsBe-tQUWtg

Oh, and here’s some self-promo:
– Last #TMIishTuesday: http://mightbedamian.tumblr.com/post/158117749249/tmiishtuesday-52-dubbing-sucks
– All #TMIishTuesdays: mightbedamian.tumblr.com/tagged/tmi
– More #TMIishTuesdays on personal topics: http://mightbedamian.tumblr.com/tagged/me
– More very cool stuff: www.twitter.com/mightbedamian
– Even more very cool stuff: mightbedamian.tumblr.com 

#TMIishTuesday #51 – DHL – Drama Help Line?

Hey,

Before we start: This Austrian human rights organisation “SOS Mitmensch” has called for people to participate in their “Populistenpause”, so ignoring any populistic, anti-islamic, anti-foreigners messages spoken out by people from the right-winged parties. The goal is to not mention anything the political right say – and just ignore them for the entire month of March. I’m going to participate in this campaign, even if I’m from Germany. So, if AfD or CSU or whoever else talk shit from tomorrow on, you won’t hear anything from me on that. It will be hard, but it will be a message.
Obviously, the more people participate, the more the impact will be noticable. Feel free to join!

Also: Last
week I told you that this post would be about dubbing, aka. the synchronised
German (or whichever language’s) version of the original dialogues of films. I
also debated whether I should share my two cents about carnival. But things changed – and so did this week’s topic.

Btw, next week’s post will be a special one (which is happening upcoming weekend),
so the post on dubbing will be up in two weeks. God! So much planning ahead
going on. But okay, enough of this rambling. Let’s get the drama started!

Hey
there mighty people of the internet!

And welcome to issue #51 of #TMIishTuesday – my weekly Tumblr post about what goes
through my weird mind and on what you guys want to know more about. It can be
something very personal, it can be something political, it can be completely
pointless – but in 99.9 % of the cases, it involves opinions. And mine as well.

// Last week was not only the 50th post of
#TMIishTuesday. I also talked about my water-proof trousers. Oh, and self-confidence.
That’s the most important topic. Have a read, if you haven’t yet. //

Right. Where to start this rant? Probably with the
reason that I got into all this shit: My phone. The on/off/unlock key of my
beloved Wiko Stairway had had some issues for the last two weeks or so. It
wasn’t working first touch all the time. On Wednesday afternoon it stopped
working completely. Naïve Damian thought, maybe taking out the battery and
putting it back in would solve the problem. Erm… But how to turn this thing
back on? Mind you: The on/off-key wasn’t working. So the only thing that taking out the battery did, was turn off the phone. GG! After a good 30 minutes of trying to
loosen the screws to check the inside of the phone, I gave up and accepted that
I needed to take the phone to the repair shop the next day – or get a new one.
After all I’d had this phone for 4 years. Btw, shout-out to Wiko: I was really
satisfied with it!

Anyway, given the age of the phone – and remembering
that I had thought about replacing it early this year anyway – I decided to look for a
new phone. So I spent about 5 hours researching phones on the internet – aka.
reading up on test reports. In the end I had enough of it and decided for the
Sony Xperia X (which ultimately sent the Samsung Galaxy S7 and the OnePlus 3 to second and third place). And I tried to get it online – with speedy
delivery. It turned out that all three electronic shops in Osnabrück didn’t
have it in stock. It was in stock in ALL stores in the surroundings, though.
Typical.

I ended up placing an order at Saturn and paying 360
Euros. They told me it would be at my place within 1 or 2 working days. Fair
enough. Amazon needed 3-5 days. Would have saved me 40 Euros, but I already
couldn’t stand the phoneliness after those 6 hours. And I didn’t want to spent
the entire weekend without one. As usual I put in my Packstation address. If
you don’t know what Packstation is: German delivery company DHL put up some
lockers at basically every other supermarket in German cities. You can register
online and then use any of these lockers as delivery address. Advantage over
the usual home delivery: They can put it there – no matter whether you’re home or
not. And you can collect it 24/7.

So far – so good of a concept. But I used the locker as
delivery address a fair few times so far. And it didn’t quite work: Two times
the lockers were full – so I had to collect it from the post office. Another
time they returned it to sender cause the address options on Amazon didn’t
indicate my “post no.” – the number needed to tell the locker I can
retrieve it with my pass. One time I ordered it to my home address cause I was
already fed up by this – and they took it to a Packstation further away after I
wasn’t home. Great job! Oh, and I have to give you that: Last month it actually
worked for once!

Anyway, I knew I had school all morning and half of
the afternoon on both Thursday and Friday, but wanted to make sure I could
actually collect the phone the day it arrived. So I thought sending it to the
Packstation was a great idea. And it looked like that. I mean… DHL decided to let
the parcel sit at the distribution center for an entire day before putting it
in the van to Osnabrück. But it’s not like I had expect speedy delivery anyway
😛

And you might be thinking that this is coming to a
quick and happy end now. And so did I. But… Things took a turn!

At 3.08 pm I got an email telling me:
“Hey! Your parcel is ready to be collected at Packstation No. B.” I
mean… I told them to send it to Packstation No. A, but hey! At least it was
there. And given that the post office was closing at 4 pm, I was glad they put
it into the other Packstation (assuming that the one I designated was full
again). And I got really excited to retrieve my phone!

But: Drama gets really drama-ry right now. Get some
popcorn!

In the email it said: “Hey! When you retrieve
your parcel, remember to bring your pass and your one-time pin that’s been sent
to your phone.”
When I read this sentence my face turned into utter
shock and terror! What the hell!? You need a pin to retrieve parcels from the
lockers?

I had only done this once before, so I just had
forgotten. I was getting really, really mad. So I googled basically anything I could imagine to come up with a solution. Result: It seems you indeed cannot retrieve
parcels, if you don’t have that stupid pin! I tried, if my phone provider
offered an option to look into your messages online. Cause that would make
sense, right? But the customer support chat told me “no.” (shoutout
to the simplytel customer support, btw! Really easy to access the chat and
really quick reply!). I then rang all my neighbours’ doors to see, if I could
borrow their phone for a minute, put my sim card in, get the code – and I would
be done. But: Since lots of my neighbours are students and it was carnival, it
so happened that none of them was home.

So I called the DHL customer service (thank God, they don’t make you pay for
that!) asking, if there was any way around this? Or if they could send it to my
email instead? Nope. No chance. Only by phone. Great! Mine was broken – and I
told the kind lady on the other end of the line exactly that. She just said: We
can’t do anything about that. But you could change the number of your account
online and press the “send new pin” button.

That’s exactly what I did: Called my father to
figure out, if he was available. He was in the middle of drinking a coffee at a
café with friends, but technically, he was available. Btw, I was REALLY lucky
that I have a landline telephone! Don’t want to think about how the following
conversations would have been, if email had been the only option.

So I changed the number of my Packstation account to my father’s phone (his secondary phone cause the
system didn’t accept his first number – it’s already saved for his account –
great feature, too, DHL! Really handy!) and pressed the “send new
pin” button. A moment later, he called telling me the code. I thanked him
for his help and made my way to the Packstation my parcel was waiting for me
(10 minutes one way). I got really excited when I entered my pass and  the four-character pin. But it said: Incorrect pin. I retried. Incorrect pin.
Double-checked on the paper that I had taken with me on which I had put it down
during the call: That’s the one! Why don’t you work then!? Entered the same
code a third time. “Entered incorrect code three times. Your parcel is now
locked. Call customer service to unlock.” – Great!

I was out of my mind at this point! WHAT THE HELL
WAS HAPPENING!? I stormed home – with no parcel. On the way back I already
thought about just hitting the road and driving to the next electronics store
that had the phone in stock. That would have meant at least 30 minutes one-way
on the road. But at least I would get my phone!

At home I saw an email from my dad: “Hey, I
just got sent a second code. Hope, you see this in time.” – Clearly I did
not… And he had sent it only five minutes earlier. That was when I was on my
way back from the Packstation already. Shout-out to DHL!

So I did the only thing I was left with: Call the customer service again. Thank
God, it was a Saturday! Both times my call was answered within one minute,
after I had denied the robot service. Anyway, I decided to not tell the
customer service about all my anger, but rather just ask them to reset the pin. A minute
later my dad rang again: “Hey, so… I just got a third code. Did you ask
for that?” – Yes, I did. I thanked him again and both of us hoped the code
would not be reset again. Luckily, it wasn’t this time. I entered the code and
– FINALLY – collected my parcel. A full two hours after the time I would have,
if they just had sent the code to my email. -.-

Anyway, that’s probably the last time I used their
Packstation “service”. You know, it’s a nice concept and everything.
But your just screwed when you don’t have a phone! Well… A working phone. (Update: I wrote this Monday night. But I already collected another parcel from the locker. This time it worked fine. Cause my phone worked…)

Oh, by now I figured out that the first pin DHL sent
my dad, after I changed the number on the DHL website, was actually the pin
they had sent me earlier (which I couldn’t see because of acute deadphonitis). Apparently
the website couldn’t cope with SO MUCH information – changing the number and
“ordering” a new pin – that it took 30 minutes to send the new pin.
GG! -.-

To end this on a positive note: Shout-out to my dad
for supporting me all the way! And: My new phone works perfectly fine! As far
as I can see, it’s definitely worth the money! Downside: I lost all my contacts
(cause I had saved them on my old phone – and you can only access the storage
when the phone is turned on. Which it won’t anymore. Screw this!). Slowly but
steadily collecting all the contacts again now.

Anyway, thanks for listening to my rant. And if I
may give you one piece of advice: Only use the Packstation “service” when you have a back-up plan! Get a
back-up phone first. Instead I might send everything to the post office directly from now on. Extra
work for them. Revenge is sweet!

Before I
go let me know your thought on DHL and the Packstation thingy. Have you used
it? Were you more lucky than me or was it quite the disaster I experienced?
Place a comment, tweet me, dm me, or do anything else
you can think of to get to me.

Queer Shoutout you say? First off: Massive congrats to everyone involved in the
Moonlight film for winning the Best Picture Oscar! So cool to see an LGBTQ+
film rocking the Oscars! And congrats to Mahershala Ali, who played the drug
dealer Juan at his younger age. And finally congrats to Barry Jenkins and Tarell
Alvin McCraney who won the Writing Oscar for the story!

Queer Shoutout of the week: An article in German newspaper Süddeutsche Zeitung
– a story about an Israeli family. In short: A gay guy is looking for a lesbian
to make a baby. They move in together, take care of their child – and each of
them still has a(nother) partner. Sounds strange? It is! But very much worth
the read.

As always: Next #TMIishTuesday next Tuesday. If you have any
questions in the meantime, just ask away.
Whatever you’re curious about – I don’t bite. 🙂

Until then: Stay mighty!




Linkage:
– Populistenpause: http://www.sosmitmensch.at/populistenpause
– Queer shoutout: http://sz-magazin.sueddeutsche.de/texte/anzeigen/45579

 Oh, and here’s some self-promo:
– Last #TMIishTuesday: http://mightbedamian.tumblr.com/post/157536488943/tmiishtuesday-50-being-me-or-self-confidence
– All #TMIishTuesdays: mightbedamian.tumblr.com/tagged/tmi
– More #TMIishTuesdays on random topics: http://mightbedamian.tumblr.com/tagged/me
– More very cool stuff: www.twitter.com/mightbedamian
– Even more very cool stuff: mightbedamian.tumblr.com 

#TMIishTuesday #50 – Being me, or: Self-confidence

Hey,

Today
marks the 50th issue of this thing called #TMIishTuesday! And it’s also pretty
close to its 1-year anniversary! I posted the first #TMIishTuesday on 23
February 2016. Since, there has been a new post on this blog pretty much every
week. Crazy! Time flies! I don’t know how else to celebrate than to just post
another one of these. 😀 So, enjoy my thoughts on self-confidence.

Hey
there mighty people of the internet!

And welcome to issue #50 of #TMIishTuesday – my weekly Tumblr post about what goes
through my weird mind and on what you guys want to know more about. It can be
something very personal, it can be something political, it can be completely
pointless – but in 99.9 % of the cases, it involves opinions. And mine as well.

// Last week I talked about questions
I see a lot on the web: “Am I gay/lesbian/whatever because [blank]?”.
I elaborated on why those kids might think that doing/wearing/liking certain
things might set them apart and why that’s not true in most cases. Oh, and I
provided some examples that are, imho, quite hilarious. If you haven’t read
that yet: Click this.
Also, on the Queer Shoutout of last week: There is now a trailer for the German
film of Moonlight. It will be in cinemas on 9 March 2017. If you’re German, I highly recommend
watching it! Might even do it again. I’ll probably bring up the topic again
next week for a language-related post. //

Back to this
week’s topic though: Self-confidence.
Last week when I wanted to depart for school it was raining. But not like
drizzling rain, proper cats-and-dogs rain. So I put on my rain-proof trousers
and got out my bike. And after 10 minutes of cycling (and being freaking happy
about those trousers!), I walked into class. Once I did, I got some funny
comments on my trousers. Obviously I got out of them as soon as I arrived, but
my classmates noticed I wore them. I just told them how freaking useful the
trousers were and how they had not done a perfect job because there were still
a few damp spots on my jeans underneath.

Afterwards
I thought about how such situations would have been in high school. My class is
very open-minded and it’s just awesome how accepting everyone is of each other.
There’s no bullying going on and we definitely have the same kind of humor.
It’s just cool!

For most of high school, however, I had a hard time. Especially during
grade 5 through 7 some of my classmates bullied me. I was the easy victim:
Older than most of them, still the smallest and by far the skinniest guy, very
shy, not trying too much to fit in. It got a little better when we grew older,
but until the end I never felt fully integrated. If I had gotten out of those
rain-proof trousers in class back then, surely that would have made for days of
teasing.

Since
high school, I’ve had lots of life experience. And I’ve understood that I have
things to be proud of as well. I’m still the skinniest kid in class. Even when
the age difference now is even larger: Pretty much everyone is 4-9 years
younger than me. But they are no fierce, pubescent people and we’ve had a cool
bond from day one. Teachers even praise our class for having such a good
atmosphere among each other.

But back
to the trousers: I think my response really made the difference here. I just
laughed along with them cause I know that I look ridiculous with those
oversized trousers. But I didn’t want to spend the day in totally wet jeans.
The rest of the class all go by car or bus/train, so they don’t have to worry
about that.

Why I
tell you all of this? Well, the take-away is: Self-confidence is key! Be you –
and you will be happy! Don’t try to be a person you don’t want to be – just to
fit in. That will only make you unhappy. Rather, try to embrace as much of
yourself as you can! Sure, being 100 % yourself is not easy. And it takes a lot
of courage – and trust – to be that 100 % around others. But the more you can
be yourself, the better. And the happier you are. Trust me, it works!

In our
class I feel like we take each other for who we are. Or at least for who we
pretend to be. I don’t pretend to be someone else around them. And that’s a
complete different feeling to high school. I don’t have to lie to them. I feel
comfortable enough to laugh about myself. That helps a lot!

But the
complete truth is: I also don’t share everything with them. I haven’t told any
of them about my sexuality. Even the girl, who works at the same company as I,
doesn’t know. The question I ask myself a lot with that regard is: Why should
she (and the other classmates) know? Is there any added value to that? I do
think that there is. Just being a little more myself. Not having to avoid
certain phrases for the fear of them judging me. But I’ve only known these
people for half a year. And I only see them for a few hours

twice a week. I’m
not too close with them. I fear their judgement. Yes, they seem super accepting.
Especially in the context of the group. But you never know what some might really
think about you. And how that might change your relationship to them. Sure, the
saying is true: If they don’t accept you for who you are, you shouldn’t care
about them either. But that’s hard. Especially in such a small class of 17 that
I’ll meet each week for the next 2 years.

I do
think that I can trust several of those 16 that they won’t spread the word, if
I told them not to. But then again: It makes life more difficult with some
knowing and some not. I think the best way would just to be open about it. And
to grab opportunities to address the topic should they arise. I actually missed
one last week. I was in the car with the colleague from class and two other
class mates. We are not crazily close, but I do feel 100 % comfortable around
them. One of them asked whether I had a girlfriend. I simply said no.
Afterwards I debated whether or not this would have been a good way to slowly
open up about the topic. With the car ride having a clear destination and my
colleague and I heading to work straight after, there would have been a
clear-cut end to any arising discussion as well.

Yeah,
but I’m drifting off off the original topic: Self-confidence. I surely AM more
self-confident than a few years back. I actually think that coming out to the
few, who know, has played a huge role in that. Besides just growing older in
general. Oh, and taking the time to explore my role in society. Just reading
lots on some stuff that interests me (see all the posts on Trump, Spaenle, and
the like on here) and growing more of a “this is who I am” feeling.
In two weeks time there’ll be another major change happening. But I won’t spoil it just yet. As a hint: It’s something I’ve wanted to do for a long time and I posted about it on this blog as well. Now I finally made an
appointment cause I feel I have the guts to do it. Self-confidence so to say.

Right.
What’s the take-away from this post:
1. It does get better.
2. You can do it –
no matter what.
3. You are just right. Whoever you are. Be yourself! It rocks!

Before I
go let me know your thoughts on self-confidence. In which ways are you
self-confident? What made you be more of the you you are know? Place a comment, tweet me, dm me, or do anything else
you can think of to get to me.

Queer Shoutout you say? Jase Peeples for advocate.com: An interview with Troye
Sivan on his album Blue Neighbourhood. It’s about one-and-a-half years old,
but I still found it very interesting. Troye talks about the album itself, what
it’s about, what some of the songs are about, and what makes the video trilogy
Wild/Fools/Talk Me Down so important. Check it!

As usual: Next #TMIishTuesday next Tuesday. If you have any
questions in the meantime, just ask away.
Whatever you’re curious about – I don’t bite. 🙂

Until then: Stay mighty!

Linkage:
– Moonlight trailer (German): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tXNhcV_YPfo
– Queer shoutout: http://www.advocate.com/music/2015/9/11/troye-sivan-these-songs-are-about-boys

Oh, and here’s some self-promo:
– Last #TMIishTuesday: http://mightbedamian.tumblr.com/post/157242375058/tmiishtuesday-49-am-i-gay-because-of
– All #TMIishTuesdays: mightbedamian.tumblr.com/tagged/tmi
– More #TMIishTuesdays on
personal topics: http://mightbedamian.tumblr.com/tagged/me
– More very cool stuff: www.twitter.com/mightbedamian
– Even more very cool stuff: mightbedamian.tumblr.com